New York City is the land of commuting. We walk everywhere, take buses, cabs, and subways to get to where we are going. If we have been lucky enough to procreate and have a small human for whom we are exclusively responsible, we have to take that small human with us everywhere. If the small human is younger than, say, five, we have to use a device called a stroller to get them around as their little legs won't do so well walking 20 city blocks or up and down subway stairs (or a combination of both). These stroller devices are usually a little bulky, mostly because they have city terrain to withstand. We're not breaking out the stroller once a month for a fun walk around the mall, it's the child's sole means of transport. Sometimes, we have to go inside places of business with said device because we can't leash our small human to a tree or light post like you lucky pet owners can. We have to stand in lines, pay for things, and even sit down at a deli table on occasion, all with the stroller. So, that being said:

STOP ROLLING YOUR EYES AND SIGHING HEAVILY BECAUSE MY STROLLER IS IN YOUR WAY. I SEE YOU AND I HEAR YOU AND YOU ARE AN ASSHOLE. HOW THE FUCK ELSE DO YOU EXPECT ME TO GET MY 16 MONTH OLD CHILD ANYWHERE? ALSO? HOW THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOUR OWN MOTHER GOT YOU AROUND? DID SHE CARRY YOU ON HER BACK UNTIL YOU WERE SIX JUST SO SHE WOULDN'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH DICKS LIKE YOU ACTING LIKE THEY'D BEEN STABBED IN THE THROAT BECAUSE A STROLLER IS STANDING BETWEEN THEM AND THE CASHIER FOR LITERALLY 13 SECONDS?!

Listen, I get it. I get that it is annoying because there are so many of them in NYC to contend with. This is where I would advise you to go live somewhere else. Go live in a place where you don't have to share essentially every square inch of breathing space with other humans because you do not belong here. And, if you can get mad at this:

then you should go live in hell (okay that was over the top but i had to write it).